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Wednesday, 20 April 2011
Monday, 18 April 2011
Regrets
Ian
I went back to the gang. William, Chee Yee and Jivat were sitting on the sofa, watching TV and eating tidbits as usual. They greeted me in their usual way,” Hi, Ian. Finish looking up for your girlfriend?” I nodded and asked, “Did any of you text Jeanette?” They shook their head in dismay. “Really?” I asked. “Do you think we are so free?” Chee Yee asked. “There’s a deal coming in tomorrow.” William added. “Whose going?” I asked. “I’m not going tomorrow. You, Chee Yee and our new member are going.” William replied. Curiosity arose in me. “Who is this new member?” I asked. William did not say anything and continued watching the TV. Who could it be who text Jeanette if it wasn’t them? Our gang leader, James, I thought. But why? Was it because I spent too much time with Jeanette? He did warn me… Maybe there could be a chance that it was James… I asked William if he was in and my guess was right. He was in his room. I knocked on the door and said, “James, it’s me, Ian!” He opened the door and told me to come in. “Take a seat. What do you want to ask? Jeanette or tomorrow’s deal?” He asked. I was astonished. It seems like as if he knew me in and out. “Jeanette.” I replied. He walked towards the window. He looks like he was having his thoughts. “I didn’t expect you to ask me about her so fast.” He said. He muttered something under his breath which I couldn’t hear. “It wasn’t I who text her but the Lion’s gang leader, Jonah.” He replied. “You’re not allowed to interfere their problems.” He added. I couldn’t understand what he was talking about. What does the Lion’s gang got to do with Jeanette? “Huh?” That was the first word that flew out of my mouth. “Jeanette joined back her gang.” He replied. “What?!” I was freaking out. She promised me she was never going to join back her gang already. Maybe it’s good for her… To have friends… Like me… She’s too lonely. I won’t expose her. Let her have the freedom she wants. “If that’s want you to know.” James added. “You mean that’s more to it?” I asked. He nodded and explained,” Her gang suspected the Lion’s gang to cheat on them of a deal last night. That was a big problem in our relationship.” Lion’s gang leader, James and Jeanette’s gang are good friends now and in the past but because of some paranoid stuff, they’re fighting? “They will be having a fight tomorrow and none of you is to interfere. Especially you, Ian. Don’t interfere.” He warned me sternly. I left the room with my mind full of thoughts.
Jeanette
I knocked at the door and came in. “Stand there. Don’t move.” I stood still, thinking of what was happening. “There’s the cockroach.” She threw the cockroach out. “What was I going to tell you about?” She thought for a moment and suddenly went, “Ah, tomorrow’s night fight.” “You don’t have to go with you don’t want. I am giving you a chance to choose if you want or not.” She continued. I don’t know. Maybe I should stop this whole thing. This gang thing and hiding everything from Ian. Maybe tomorrow’s the dateline. To stop hiding things from Ian. Confession. There’s too much maybe. I don’t know. I feel like screaming out my thoughts. My problems. I hate this. I want to end this tomorrow. Tomorrow. “So how?” She snapped me out of my thoughts. “I recommend you to join us. It’s going to be a lot of fun, you know. Don’t listen to that rubbish Jessica was talking about. Usually she don’t really agree with me to take you juniors to a fight but I have to teach your how to fight.” She smiled. I nodded. When I went out, Jessica was the first one to ask. I didn’t hear what she was talking about. I feel like I couldn’t hear anything, my ears were blocked by my thoughts. Whatever choice I have made, I will not change my mind. I choose not to hurt him. Later, I went off with Jessica and Janice. We reached the place at exactly . They were already there. Janice passed me the money and I opened the doors and walked towards one of their men. “Money first.” The men said. I threw the bag to them. The men nodded. The other men passed the drugs to the men and he threw it to me. Suddenly, someone shouted, “Police!” The scene was chaotic but everyone flee for their life. I saw Ian but I believe my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me. It was him and he knows the truth already. I sighed. It was earlier than I expected. Too early. I thought I could spend more time with him before tomorrow night arrives.
Friday, 15 April 2011
Regret
Ian
I knew that running away isn’t the solution but I couldn’t think of anything else expect that. I panted and turned back as I ran faster and faster. I was supposed to meet her tonight at the old place. I couldn’t find another excuse. My excuse was I wasn’t feeling well. Who am I lying to? The gang leader just nodded and smiled,” Lad, go. The next time, no more I am not feeling well.” The stare that he gave me was scarier than before. It seems like I was in his blacklist. I felt my phone vibrating. It was her. When I reached the bus stop, I saw William, Jivat and Chee Yee buying the food back. “Hey! You are not going to eat? Meeting her again?” Asked William. I nodded and replied, “I am rushing.” They barely said anything. Before they left, William whispered to me, “Be careful.” It was a mysterious warning that I totally don’t get it. When I reached there, she was looking around and when she saw me, she ran towards me. “You alright! Thank goodness.” She hugged me tightly. “What happened?” I asked. She wiped her tears. “Look at this. I received this afternoon.”
Jeanette, look around u. There will be ur
“I know who it is. My friends just played a prank on you. Chill. Nothing will happen. No one will die. If you did, I will go with you.” I assured her. I could see from her eyes that she is afraid. She sighed as we went into the empty house. The walls were vandalised by us. “Ian loves Jeanette. Together forever.” She was preparing the dinner which is the usual instant noodles. Even though we ate always ate instant noodles, we always felt the happiness. “Today, I added some prawns.” She forced a smile. “Prawns?” I laughed. “What’s so funny about it?” she asked. “I thought you’re afraid of prawns?” I replied. “Hell, no. Who told you?” she said as she continued,” You don’t anyhow say.” She chased me around. “Haha!” She caught up with me. “I thought someone said in his dreams go away prawns.” “No…” She laughed and replied, “Never mind. I can never talk back you. Let’s eat.” We ate happily as usual. She was upset about something, I could see it. After dinner, she did not say anything. Maybe it was because of that threatened message, I guess. I will let her sleep quietly and I have to get back to that gang to do some questioning. I haven’t seen her so afraid of stuff like that. In the past, she would be like me thinking that it’s just a prank from her friends but now, she has no friends expect me. I mean, rather than my gang of friends. She is lonely. She is not even close to my friends. She is worse than me. I should treat her better in any case. She lies on that old mattress and shut her eyes. I whispered,” Good night. I love you. Always.” I kissed her on her cheeks and left.
Jeanette
Who am I joking? Why must I lie to him? I chose to. I didn’t mean to hurt him. Never. Why did I show him the message in the first place? Coz I no longer want to lie to him. Everything’s going to change. Me, him, everything. I chose to lose him than everything because I choose not to hurt him. He’s the best guy I have ever seen in my whole life. I am happy to have him as a friend already. I am satisfied as I cried silently. I have made my choice and I will not change my mind. My phone beep and I knew it was time for me to go that place. I thought about what happened yesterday. Have they solved the resolve yet? When I reached there, Jessica was already waiting for me. “You are here. There’s a deal coming in later. We are giving one last chance to prove you worthy.” I barely nodded and asked,” What about yesterday?” She paused for a while and replied,” It’s not really settled. They have made to do deals and yesterday problem will be settled tomorrow at night here.” I nodded and said,” Is there anything I need to do tomorrow?” She stopped and shook her head in dismay. “Don’t get involved. It’s something major. You, see my leg.” She folded her jeans and showed me her leg. It was the most horrifying thing I have ever seen. “During one of the fight, the other gang took the knife and it stabbed very deep.” I was astonished by the cut. “Wasn’t it painful?” I asked as I imagined how painful it might. “Sometimes it’s very painful till I can’t take it. I have to take my medicine once I can’t take the pain.” She shrugged. I nodded. I pitied her. I was asked to talk to Janice privately. I was shrugged. Why? Was it because of yesterday’s problem? As every step took me nearer to Janice’s room, my heart pounded faster as before. I took a deep breath when I was outside her room, fearing that I was in trouble.
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